What my daughter taught me about trust (and why we reach for control when we’re afraid)

Safety, surrender, and what happens when we mistake control for connection.

A lot of my clients describe feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or simply out of control. And in a world like ours, that makes sense. So much feels unpredictable—our health, our relationships, the headlines, even our own emotions. Control becomes the illusion we reach for to feel safe.

But one day, the Lord gave me an image that reframed everything.

I was playing with my daughter, Ava. She loves when I throw her onto the bed. She calls it “yeeting.” (Y-E-E-T.) She runs, I scoop her up, toss her into the air, and for a split second she’s weightless—completely out of control.

And yet, she laughs.

When she’s flying through the air, she’s not anxious about her lack of control. She’s exhilarated by it. Why? Because she trusts me. She knows my heart, my strength, and my delight in her. Her joy isn’t in being in control—it’s in being safe while not in control.

That’s what the Lord showed me:
You can experience a lack of control without fear when you trust the goodness of the One who holds you.

For Ava, …